Hello fellow warriors!! My name is Rich, I'm 35 yrs of age, and Im from Shamokin Pennsylvania. I apologize in advance cuz this may be a longer post then I intended it to be. I was officially diagnosed on April 21, 2016. However, back in the final days of 2009 into the first few days of 2010 I began to experience Lhermittes sign. Now in November of 2008, I was released from a state prison and before I was even released I had a job lined up at the local McDonald's. I was in excellent shape physically at the time but between all that greasy food I'd eat and since I turned 19, 20, and 21 yrs old in the penitentiary I wasted no time in catching up with my buddies and began to drink like a fish. Eventually I blew up to 387 lbs and that when the Lhermittes began. I just assumed my weight was to blame or had a pinched nerve, but because I had no insurance I went to a free clinic to see a doctor. He basically said your fat and lose weight, so let's just say you get what you pay for. About 4-5 months later I lost 180 lbs and got down to around 205 lbs. I'm 6'4" by the way so I was an athletic big guy and even tho I weighed that much, I hid it very well. By the time I lost the wait the Lhermittes had subsided so I moved on and just figured that and figured the free clinic doctor was right. Early 2016 the Lhermittes came back and was much more intense. So naturally I figured I'd do what the clinic doctor said in 2010, however I had no weight to lose really. I used to be part of a traveling basketball team that would play in any tournament with a cash prize, but every April there is a charity tournament that I've never missed since the tourney was started. The morning of the tournament it was like my entire body was experiencing Lhermittes and had to walk like Frankenstein's monster and couldn't play, and that's what put everyone on high alert that so things very wrong because I barely come out if the game let alone not play at all. Everyone kept saying go get checked but my stubborn ass thought I knew what to do and brushed it off. A couple days later the good old fashioned MS hug made a visit which scared me into getting checked by a paid doctor. I did the 3 MRI's and got confirmation it was MS. They initially had me seeing a specialist that only deals with MS in Wilkes Barre, PA. He was blunt and straightforward (which I appreciate) and told me the amount of damage and lesions that show up in my MRIs he would bet everything he has that my MS started back in that '09-'10 time frame. He also was impressed I was walking without any assistance because of the images from the MRI images, and that he can guarantee me that in 5yrs I'll be using a walker or cane, and wheelchair bound in 10.  So basically because it was atleast 90 minutes away and I didn't like the doctor, wanted to prove to hin he was wrong with his "predictions". Since my last major flare up in 2016 my world has been flipped upside down. Fight with depression and anxiety daily, Ive lost my son whom I have custody of, have no feeling in most of my body, lost my job because all of a sudden I began to sleep for literal days which ked me to missing work, and staying on sofas moving between friends' houses. In October of last year I snapped out of some trance I was in and realized I had my pistol on my lap ready to end it all. I asked my mother to watch my son until I got everything straightened out because I don't want him coming home from school to a "Kurt Cobain" situation. Ever since then I did what I had to do to get better yet she refuses to give him back.... So I stopped my psych meds, donated most of my clothes, and sold everything I owned. My brother and I lived together and my room is still open and available to me, but my parents live across the street and my family isn't the most supportive kind. They have the suck it up and do it attitude  and they only contribute and pile all their BS onto my MS. I was denied disability so with no income and basically being homeless, Ive been left with no choice but to do illegal activities for money which will end up getting me out away for a long time once again. I started off with Tecfidera as a treatment but after a year my next MRI's shown that it wasn't helping because 2 new lesions were found, so then I switched to Ocrevus. For some reason the Ocrevus made me feel worse physically so because of that and also reading my medical records I decided to say "F" it and stop treatment. Every appt with the neurologist I'd complain about pain I've had for year in my lower back and I would my back would occasionally lock up for a few days. She wouldn't even examine me and just say there's nothing wrong and it's in my head. I was able to read my records and every MRI report stated that I also have degenerative disc disease... Best part is nobody has yet to tell me so I decided if they don't want to do thejr job correctly and help, then I'm not wasting my time either. I apologize again for this long post but I have nobody to open up to or vent, and if I do they just don't understand. Every day is a struggle now and I just want it to be over. Thank you for giving me your time reading and somewhere to get some of this stuff off if my chest. I love you all, be safe, and even tho I've given up you're all heros in my eyes ❤️❤️❤️

Hello all!! Never opened up but here's some of my story. Sorry so long

No one told me how hard this f ##ked up thing is it's a battle every day to keep going keep going for my family .sorry for rant I'm james

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Hello all!! Never opened up but here's some of my story. Sorry so long

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