HELP! Am I depressed?
I don't know if anyone else feels like this, but over the past couple of months I feel lethargic, down and very teary. It's like everything I do, I hit a brick wall and don't want to continue. I've had suicidal ideation, stopped only by the thought of the impact on my family and my partner. I've cried to my partner, and despite him telling me that I'm strong and he's there for me no matter what, I don't feel like I can continue. The thought of how I'll eventually become is terrifying. My studies have brought me into contact with people who are further down the MS line. I don't want to be wheelchair bound, or need a stick to walk. My new DMT, the synthetic myelin injection one, will require me to not have children, which obviously I want in the future.
If anyone has had/currently has depression, can I have guidance on how you go about telling your GP? How did you admit it to your family? How did they react?
Thank you in advance for any hints and tips.
There's so much in your post that I don't believe I'll say anyway near everything that needs to be said but I thought I'd start and I'm sure others will chip in. First of all, I'm sending loads of sympathy and virtual hugs ((((())))) - I really feel for you and hope you can get to feel better soon. I was horrified at the idea that you have been offered a DMT that will prevent you from having children. If I had been offered such a thing (such a choice really) when I was diagnosed, I think I would have been very depressed too. There are lots of highly effective DMTs which don't affect your ability to have children and you should be given one of these. I had two children after diagnosis with MS and know lots of women who have MS and children. I really believe you can be a mother and no one should be telling you that you can't. Please talk to your neurologist about different DMTs and motherhood. I also believe that it is very hard for you to have been diagnosed with MS and to see people who are a long way on in the disease. Most of us had a much gentler introduction to what MS can do to people than you have had. There's a good chance that you won't end up disabled, just because there are much more effective drugs available now to fight the disease than there were even ten years ago. Hope this helps - please put in a friend request for me if you want to chat more privately.
You're not alone, @cwright17 , MS can seem to become a huge burden and we can need help to get everything back into perspective. Our life is a journey from cradle to grave. Yes, we'll all eventually get old and die, but that does not stop us living whilst we're here. Having MS is just another of the trials and tribulations that make up life. Yes, you will see people with MS, who use sticks and wheelchairs. But, you may not see those with MS that don't need these mobility aids - and there's a lot of them around! Medical science has moved forwards in huge leaps and bounds. There are now a range of treatments available to help you manage your MS. Treatments that weren't available a few years ago. So, having MS is no longer a one-way ticket to a wheelchair. And, it's not a reason to say you'll never have children. All things are still possible. Yes, have a chat with your GP about how you're feeling now. They can offer some help, maybe anti-depressants, just to take the edge of how you're presently feeling.