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emotional abusive spouse

I want to bring up a subject that is hard to talk about but I know it needs to be said. I am 57 and have been with my husband for 38 years. Our marriage was full of struggles but lately, it has become unbearable. I was taken out of work in 1999 at 39 yrs. old since then the abuse has slowly drawn to a point where my MS flare-ups leave me unstable. My neurologist was so complexed as to why my symptoms were not typical of MS, I asked him if stress could be a factor, the month before I tried to tell his assistant but I felt so embarrassed. Finally, my husband wasn't with me and I made up my mind, I was going to tell someone of the abuse. When I told him my husband is emotionally abusing me, he said that is it! Your abuse is causing you to have relapses! Through my tears, I asked how many are there of us out there? He said thousands, he upped my depression medicine and refer me to a psychologist who diagnosed me with PTSD. I have been making strides in leaving my husband which is an overwhelming task. I started attending meetings at the local domestic abuse center and see their therapist. I have read so many articles on Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Terms such as gaslighting, hovering and crazy love are some of the terms used. I began to see patterns that described my husband. Please if you are suffering from an abusive spouse get help! I want anyone who is being abused to seek help, it is not your fault and you did not cause it! My MS is still unstable, a new symptom I have been dealing with is swallowing problems and choking along with dry mouth, increase weakness especially when showering and my welts from Copaxone continues to be an issue. Thank you for reading this!

Hi @babycakes . Thank you for coming forward and highlighting this very emotive issue. MS is not a useful addition to a relationship and can be the "straw that breaks the camel's back"! This kind of situation can destroy a healthy person, so the damage it can do an MSer, and their frail health, is inestimable. If a relationship is not beneficial to both parties, then it may well be time to consider calling it a day. Yes, ending the relationship can be hugely scary, but there is advice and support out there to overcome this hurdle. You owe it to your health and future wellbeing. Take care @babycakes and I wish you well for the future.


I do hope that you are now out of this relationship now and it is so brave and kind of you to share this problem. Well done. I hope that this helps others who are in a similar situation. Good luck.