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New teacher with MS struggle

Hi All. It is the first time to post something but I really need some advice. So I am a single mum with two kids age 4 and 6. I was diagnosed in 2019. Last year I have completed initial teacher training course and got hired as secondary school maths teacher . I was then told to teach kS5 physics which is something I am not fully confident at but could not say no. I have been stressed since September adjusting with the work load, the new role as well as being a mum. I started to get panic attack and became really anxious about everything and ended up signed off sick for two week. Now I am on my second week off still unable to destress, still thinking about work and still feeling guilty for taking this time off. I am telling myself that this is not the right career for me and planning to resign before Easter.. I am so lost and depressed and I want to feel normal again and stop worrying. Sorry about the long talk but I just can't get my thoughts together..Any advice would really appreciate

I'm sorry you are feeling like this. I've suffered with anxiety and panic attacks for years now and understand how paralysing it can be. I think it's OK to take time off. Don't rush back. I've done that due to guilt and I should have been kinder to myself. You are pretty amazing to qualify as a teacher while raising two small children. Don't forget that. While you are employed you have rights. In addition you have rights due to the MS. While taking time to reset and repair get some advice from a union maybe. Be kind to yourself. I've used meditation to manage my anxiety and I find it useful. I'm wishing you well.


Thanks a lot Claire for your words .. yes I think that what I will do in regards to work and definitely I need to be kinder to myself I always priorities everyone but me . I started doing meditation hopefully that will ease my stress a little