Hi folks, it's been a while I know. That was down to me attempting to convince myself that this thing wasn't real, i guess 'deniability' would be the operable (inoperable?) word. Anyway, I can't hide any longer, approx 2:30 am this morning I was lying on my bed (couch actually, always preferred to a bed, even prior my ms diag, pls don't get into anything regarding this fact tho it's just not gonna change) & i find myself, for no apparent reasoning, spasticating my arms around & generally being plain stupid in a way that scared me more than any of the other symptons that have inflicted pain on me. It lasted all of about 30mins but for a long time afterwards I was refecting about how bad this was & like 'omg! is this the spiralling downward trend to my ultimate demise!' ... so yeh, it hit home, hard, that this isn't going away, in fact, by logical (finally) reasoning this is only going to get worse, like a snowball to hell (i just hope it lands full frozen lol!) it's just gonna roll faster & get bigger. But hey, ultimately I don't give a crap or at least keep telling myself that i don't, i like to stay optimistic, even in the face of seemingly unpenetrable odds. Ok so that's that piece of snews (schlerotic, i don't generally follow media so feel the addendum justified). As a post script... I haven't like i said, been around for a while (apologies to anyone who may have been concerned) as i was trying to put this whole thang in the bottom draw pile of life stuff but yeh (get to the point dude!) kk well i typed in the address bar (not browser) shiftms.com instead of shift .ms and it led to this http://dramir.com/testimonials.php?t=18 which confused me till i realized my mistake. Is that something the shift staff instigated or just a tag fisher making the most out of peoples typing mistakes? Just curious. I'll likely be around more now this spasticity issue has reared it's fugly head. I wasn't trying to ignore anyone or anybody's post, was just trying to hide from this thing, apologies all. Hi Gav (hope your still here, it was your vids that initially got me to shift so i'll always remember that, ty).