Rubbish Jokes and Shit Poetry
We all love them don't we?
Yes of course we do, it's a wonderful feeling to know that our there is someone who is pure comedy, and that Poetry doesn't all have to be about wandering as lonely as a cloud
(which theoretically is improbable given the molecular make up of said cloud) Anyway, I'm in the mood for tittering, or any word that has 'tit' in it.
Here are some shit jokes and terrible poetry.
Behold the wonder:
Jokes:
-------
Two fat blokes in a pub, one says to the other "Your round.."
The Other one says
"so are you, you fat bastard."
Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them.
It's either my mum or my dad. Or my older brother Colin. Or my younger brother Ho-Cha-Chu. Its not me, so I think it's Colin.
I made a Freudian Slip at dinner last night, I meant to say to my mother-in-law "please pass the peas," but instead I said
"You stupid bitch, you've completely ruined my life."
Poems
------
Behold Behold the Lamb of God
As it skips and hops,
I know that soon the Lamb of God,
Will be
The Lamb of Chops
-Spike Milligan
I am a dry-stone waller,
All day I dry-stone-wall,
Of all appalling calling's,
Dry-stone-walling's worst of all.
-Pam Ayres
Love is like Poetry,
Linguistically Hell,
Sometimes is appalling
At times it goes well,
Occasional compliments
Yet some day's no-one cares,
Wish I could be Byron
But I'm
Pam
Fucking
Ayres.
-Marjolie
Films:
-------
Ritz to the Tits
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r7xgiO_NdkQ
Cake Factory
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JibxHpXqAfc
Fell free to leave a comment, post your own, or say the word 'tits'.
Thank you x
Tits
Hooray!