Theresa | Tomorrow to me.

What does the word ‘Tomorrow’ mean to you?

Tomorrow has always brought me a sense of hope that whatever happened today may pass. Tomorrow is an opportunity. Tomorrow is a fresh start. Tomorrow brings purpose.

How do you prepare for the future while living with MS?

Honestly, I don't! So far, MS has taught me to be more present. I can do all the best planning and preparing but MS is going to do what it's going to do and that is different every day. I have goals and I have plans, but I don't stress about too many details because it could all change when I wake up the next morning. MS is teaching me to roll with it and adjust as things go along.

Do you think about your future work and employment?

All the time. I recently had to reduce work hours because I wasn't feeling well and it was really affecting everything. I'm starting to feel a little better and I wish to increase hours again. While this has been happening periodically, I've watched many of my coworkers get promoted around me because they are able to work more hours and take on more responsibilities. I know that I am a valued, hardworking employee and I've been told that they can't wait to see me move forward, but it's really until I can work more, and I have no idea what MS has in store for me. In some ways, MS helped me advance in life, but when it comes to work, MS has really been awful.

What advice would you give to another MSer worried about what tomorrow may bring?

You cannot control today what hasn't happened yet tomorrow. Face things as they come one step at a time. Don't overwhelm yourself by living past, present and future all at once. Tomorrow is full of mystery, enjoy the excitement!

How were you diagnosed with MS? How did you feel? What do you remember about that day?

I woke up with Diplopia 11/4/2018. I drove to work with one eye open hoping that it would just go away. It did not. I left work shortly after arriving and went to an ER in a small-town hospital. They did an MRI and told me they found something on my brain but couldn't say what because there was no neurologist on staff that day; I had to drive to a bigger city.

My heart sank. I felt overwhelming sadness.

I stayed overnight in the larger hospital and had another MRI. On 11/5/2018, the neurology team at the hospital explained that I had enough active and inactive lesions on my brain and spine to diagnose it as MS. I had no idea what I was facing; I had never spoken to anyone about MS before. I went home later that day. My family was incredibly supportive but didn't understand MS either. We have all learned a lot since then, but I felt very alone for a few months before finding Shift.ms.