Heh, I climbed mountains and ran marathons. It was a huge part of my identity and it’s gone…at least for now. But this winter I tried skiing again for the first time since my diagnosis. I didn’t ski the way I used too but I was still proficient and had a great time. I have been working out everyday and hope to start climbing again. Maybe it’s delusion or denial. The way I see it though, what’s the alternative? MS is like an even shittier version of puberty. Everything changes except always for the worse. The best you can do is play the cards in your hand.

I realize I didn’t entirely answer your question. I don’t mourn for myself all that much. I don’t see the point. Your future was never guaranteed. I am not going to tell you to be thankful for what you have but what I will say is how you attack the day is entirely up to you. There are days that I am angry in my bones about it. I vent it out, and sometimes scream into the voice during a workout, and then I refocus. I don’t think asking yourself whether you’re happy or sad or angry is the right question, or at least a question geared for long term sustainability. The more interesting question is what are you prepared to do about it?