Ooof, @Michelle_Dangirwa, that sucks so much. I remember when I fully digested what the "progressive" label meant. I was never going to feel any better than I did right at that moment. To say that screwed with my brain would be an understatement. I totally understand how you're feeling. Your question is such a good one: what do we still live for? It's something I peripherally touched on with @heidihelps in another post, where I think I referred to it as a spark of hope. Those tiny little things that we experience that make us put one foot in front of the other in spite of all the other garbage in our life. It can be something as stupid as watching a stray cat lounge in the sun, or the feeling of a cool breeze on a hot day. Dumb shit that we take for granted but that is undeniably nice. I can't do anything for you, you're going to have to navigate this yourself. But, if it makes any difference at all, some person, half way across the world, was moved enough by your story to take time out of his day to write you a note telling you that your MS makes you strong as hell. You've had experiences that would crush other people and you're still standing. Be proud of who you are and the simple fact that you're still here. You deserve happiness and you will find it. Give yourself a hug from all the folks who have read your words and been moved. And be kind to yourself.

I’m so sorry I know how you feel like why is this happening to me? I was diagnosed with Sjögrens syndrome and Lupus(SLE) first then the following year with RRMS. I felt so hopeless and scared especially from too much googling. But mainly because I have two boys and my youngest was only 18 months old when I started getting really sick. I hope at least venting will help you and all the people here with different info can help you as well. Sending you lots of good thoughts hang in there.