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stumbler
2 months ago

@cheryl602 , I’m sorry that you have been given this diagnosis to deal with.

What does the future hold? Nobody knows, from the healthiest to the sickest. Life is wildly unpredictable for everybody.

But, it’s natural to have these thoughts, It is part of the grieving process for the life we believe we are leaving behind.

MS is no longer the condition that is talked about in hushed circles. It’s still a taboo subject, which is a shame. It is now a condition which can be managed by medications developed over the last 20-30 years.

So, take your time as you process this diagnosis. Do some research, at your own pace. The “Newly Diagnosed” tag on this page is a good place to start :-

https://support.mstrust.org.uk/shop


cheryl602
2 months ago

@stumbler

Thanks for your reply, its definatly not sunk in yet although it was the diagnosis i was fully expecting as id done alot of research on it already
I suppose no amount of research can prepare you for actually being told it though
The first few days i was fine, it was just another (Large) bump in the road that seems to be my life since turning 30!
But last night i had an absolute meltdown and today i havnt mentally felt ok, physically i feel fine though, i suppose that will have to be gotten used to until i think ive fully accepted that life will have to be moulded and adapted
Im sure in time i will accept it though, just for right now i dont think im doing very well at it


stumbler
2 months ago

@cheryl602 , don’t be so hard on yourself. This grieving process can take upwards of a year or more.

Expected or not, a formal diagnosis still can hit you like a freight train.


cheryl602
2 months ago

@stumbler

Ill try and not be so hard on myself, although kind of beating myself up about it, as i say ill be fine once its been accepted by myself
Im pushing everyone closest to me away at the moment
Just not having a good time today as i say!
Tomorrow is a new day though 🙂
Thanks for taking the time to reply
Hope you are doing well today


sarahpen
2 months ago

Hi
I was diagnosed in February and am still trying to process things too. I’m not sure where you are in the world, but if you are in the UK the MS society run a 4 week course online to help people through the this phase. I’ve just completed it and it has helped me process things and adapt my mindset.
In my opinion, when life throws a curve ball like this at you, it’s probably better to be upset now and process things than to live in denial. Hope you find a way through it.


a_girls_gotta_eat
2 months ago

Hello,
I’ve been diagnosed with RRMS for a while now. some days it doesn’t exist, other days it’s all I am. Take it easy. I only just got my head around accepting even then it gets frustrating.


jadeshelley
2 months ago

I’m coming up to my 4th year of diagnosis and i still have days where it hits me hard. I too struggled at the start with it, I tried to push it out of my mind and try to forget about it, but that was the worst I could have done as it all came crashing down around me a year later. Everyone finds their own way to deal with this. Whatever your feeling is completely normal! If you want to cry then cry, if you want to wallow and grieve then that’s perfectly normal too! The main thing is you will know when ur ready to say okay this is what it is, and u will get through it. We have all been there! If you ever need to talk u can always talk to me or anyone in this group as we are all going through the same thing xxx


vixen
2 months ago

Hi there @cheryl602, welcome to Shift. Yes, this is the roughest time; your body and mind are trying to adjust and, for now, you need to go with the flow. Feel what you feel and do whatever it takes to get through this time, because this time will pass. For now, the usual things are to eat and sleep as healthy as possible. Don’t overdo things, as balance is so important. Stress, although natural, has quite a substantial impact on us so it’s really important to not let it overwhelm you; easier said than done, I know. Take care and post your worries, questions and comments anytime, someone will have a response! 🙂


lilypalooza
2 months ago

Hey @cheryl602! I’m recently diagnosed too (feb)…just like you I’d done my research and knew diagnosis was likely so thought I was prepared. The truth is you’re never really prepared for any sort of diagnosis. I have really good days where I forget and then all consuming days where MS takes control (mentally and physically), throw in a pandemic and that is an epic amount of stuff to process! However, if i’ve learnt anything so far, as has been said…take your time, don’t rush, be kind to yourself! Use this forum (it has helped me so much) to ask questions/advice or just to vent. We understand, no judgement just a friendly ear to listen and support.

As @stumbler says acceptance (or at least getting your head around it) takes a long time, something I have to remind myself about daily! Xxx


cheryl602
2 months ago

@lilypalooza – thanks for your reply, i feel like im really trying to take it all in my stride amd deal with it as best as i can, i guess its understandable that im struggling though, its good to talk to people who understand though, because i think the people closest to me, although im able to talk about it, none of them really understand, thats something i will have to work on myself though, to stop hating the world, to stop taking it out on people and causing unecessary drama- Just get on with it and take as much time as i need

@vixen-thanks for your reply, ive been on a mini rollercoaster in the past 6 days from being ok about it, to being depressed about it, to being angry about it, to some dark thoughts,to the dread of life beyond going to bed at night
Its all just going to take time which is something i will have to learn
Also will need to work on my sleep becsuse that is terrible at the minuite and is affecting my day
Greatly, from struggling to wake up, being late for work, general low moods

@jadeshelley-thank you, its really helping to read these replies and know that whst im feeling and going through is normal and will pass once eventualy sunk in that it is happening wether i like it or not
I do feel like an instant burden to people know though which is rubbish
Time is all i need i suppose 🕓

@ a_girls-gotta_eat- i feel like that with some of my past things- i was misdiagnosed with cervical cancer in 2018, it took a massive toll on my life at that moment, some days it really effected me, other days it felt like i was telling someone elses story
So maybe in time this will become the same situation
I will just take my time and take each day as it comes

@sarahpen-Im in the UK too, Manchester, i will have a look into the 4 week course, it would definatly help
I dont want to live in denial because no matter how much i could try, it would come out in the end 10 fold!
As you say its best to process and be upset now in the moments when its happening and i feel it, rather that it rearing its head on a good day which is a potential!

Thank you all for your responses! means alot that you have all taken the time to speak to me about how im feeling and making me see that is is in fact normal ❤


itsmewithms
2 months ago

Welcome to the private club none of us wanted to be in 😉 but at least we are in it together. It does take some time to adjust to and accept the diagnosis. For me there was tat least one positive as at least I had an explanation to some of the strange diagnosed symptoms in the past and, at that point, there was a treatment path and new DMTs fresh to the market. It was a time (2005) when they fully expected to “cure” MS within a few years. Well, still waiting on that! but at least it is better understood and there are many drugs that are truly impacting disease course now. I don’t think MS of the future will follow all the trends of the past and they are now able to document that.

In your search for information this group is a good one as are the various MS societies and the material on Dr Boster’s site. This is his message to the newly diagnosed- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wvQXygHtYzc

Welcome and good luck-


cheryl602
2 months ago

@itsmewithms

Not a private club i ever thought id be in, but here i am 👋
Im sure we all feel that though!
I was somewhat glad with the diagnosis, not because i was happy by any strech of the imagination dont get me wrong, but for the simple fact of releif i wasnt actually going mad and these things were infact happening in my body and i wasbt imagining them
Im hopeful that once i get an appointment to see the MS nurses that they will be able to find me a DMT that is suitable for me

I will have a look at the youtube video shortly, thanks for the message 🙂

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