A practical guide for people whose nervous system occasionally works from home. Yoga can actually be brilliant for MS. Balance, flexibility, mobility, stiffness, core strength, body awareness and relaxation. So here are some of the best moves I've found. A wall, chair and basic sense of humour are recommended. --- 🐄 1. CAT-COW Also known as: The Morning MOT Start on your hands and knees. Slowly round your back upwards, then gently arch the other way. Good for: gently mobilising the spine, back and neck. Perfect first thing in the morning when you've woken up feeling like somebody stored you in a suitcase overnight. First movement: CRACK. Second: CRUNCH. Third: "There we fucking go." Five minutes later you've progressed from Victorian grandfather to moderately serviceable human being. Move slowly. We're loosening the machinery, not trying to pull-start a lawnmower. --- 🌳 2. TREE POSE Also known as: The Pissed Flamingo Stand on one leg and place the other foot against your ankle or calf. Use a wall or sturdy chair. Good for: balance, ankle stability and proprioception, basically your brain knowing where your body is. Which is apparently an optional extra with MS. Brain: We're leaning left. Body: No we're not. Brain: We definitely fucking are. Body: Trust me. Wall: BANG. Holding onto something isn't cheating. It's called not turning yoga into a hospital admission. --- 🪑 3. CHAIR POSE Also known as: The Festival Toilet Feet apart. Bend your knees. Push your bum backwards as if you're sitting down. Except there isn't a chair. Good for: quads, glutes and core, all useful for standing and walking. Basically imagine you're hovering over a toilet at a three-day music festival. Suddenly your technique becomes flawless. Ten seconds: easy. Twenty seconds: thighs shaking. Thirty seconds: you're seeing dead relatives. Eventually both legs start vibrating like a washing machine with a brick inside it. Sit down. You've done enough. Preferably on an actual chair this time. --- 🧍‍♂️ 4. MOUNTAIN POSE Also known as: The Neurologist's Office Stand upright with your weight evenly distributed through both feet. That's genuinely it. Good for: posture, alignment and body awareness. Easy? Apparently fucking not. "Stand normally." I AM. "Try to distribute your weight evenly." I AM. "You're leaning." THIS IS WHAT NORMAL LOOKS LIKE NOW, SUSAN. Bonus difficulty: Close your eyes. Actually... don't. We'd only just finished repairing the wall after Tree Pose. --- ⚔️ 5. WARRIOR II Also known as: The False Sense of Security Wide stance. Bend the front knee. Arms out. Look forward. Good for: leg strength, hips, core, balance and endurance. For the first ten seconds this is fantastic. Look at me. Strong. Balanced. Powerful. DO I EVEN HAVE MS? MS: "Sorry, were you enjoying yourself?" Left leg starts shaking. Foot rotates somewhere I didn't authorise. One arm slowly lowers. Knee begins making independent decisions. Within thirty seconds I've gone from ancient warrior to bloke trying to put his underpants on standing up. --- 🐕 6. DOWNWARD-FACING DOG Also known as: Well, I'm Down Here Now Hands down. Bum up. Gently stretch through the backs of the legs. Good for: calves, hamstrings and shoulders. This can feel amazing when your legs are stiff. Getting into it is surprisingly easy. Then comes the advanced section: standing back up. Brain: Stand. Legs: Message received ✓✓ Brain: Stand. Legs: Typing... Brain: HELLO? Legs: Your request is important to us. Current response time is 3–5 working days. Remain calm. Eventually someone will find you. "Are you stuck?" No. I'm stretching. Never surrender the narrative. --- 🦵 7. SEATED FORWARD FOLD Also known as: The Fucking Calf Sit with your legs forward and gently reach towards your feet. Good for: stretching the hamstrings and backs of the legs. Lovely if MS has replaced your hamstrings with suspension bridge cables. Reach forward. Breathe. Relax. Slightly further. Beautiful. Peaceful. Zen. Then: CALF CRAMP. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK. Suddenly you've gone from yoga to wrestling your own leg like it's a crocodile that got into the kitchen. Eventually it releases you. Take a moment. Find inner peace again. Namaste, you bastard. --- 👶 8. CHILD'S POSE Also known as: Pacing With Excellent PR Kneel, sit gently backwards towards your heels and stretch your arms forward. Use cushions if needed. Good for: gently stretching the back and hips while giving yourself a recovery break. This is where I discovered MS people have actually been practising yoga for years. We just didn't know it. You're not exhausted. You're restorative. You're not hiding from everyone. You're regulating your nervous system. You're not face-down on the carpet wondering why you started exercising. You're practising mindful recovery. Amazing. We've taken "I need a fucking minute" and turned it into wellness. --- 🪲 9. KNEES-TO-CHEST Also known as: The Capsized Tortoise Lie on your back and gently bring your knees towards your chest. Good for: lower back, hips and glutes. Lovely. Comfortable. Relaxing. Unfortunately you've made a tactical error. You're on the floor. Now get back up. Roll left. No. Roll right. Elbow down. Push. Wrong leg. Back down. Hands and knees. Locate sofa. Grab sofa. Push. UUUUURRRRRGGGHHHH. Stand. Check nobody witnessed it. You've successfully transformed a gentle stretch into a six-stage emergency evacuation procedure. --- 🧱 10. LEGS UP THE WALL Also known as: The NHS Budget Cut Lie on your back with your legs supported against a wall. Good for: a gentle supported stretch and a proper recovery break. Possibly the most financially efficient rehabilitation programme ever created. Wall holds legs. Floor holds body. I provide breathing. Teamwork. Someone walks in: "Why are you lying on the floor?" Physiotherapy. "Why have you got biscuits?" Please don't interfere with my treatment. --- 💀 11. CORPSE POSE Also known as: FUCKING FINALLY Lie down. Close your eyes. Relax. Good for: recovery and relaxation at the end of your session. Finally. My event. Years of MS fatigue have prepared me for this exact moment. Instructor: "Allow your body to become heavy." Already nailed it. "Release all muscular effort." Way ahead of you. "Stay here for five minutes." Five? Amateur. Then they always ruin it: "Whenever you're ready, slowly return to sitting." No. I'm pacing. My Garmin says Body Battery 6. Tell my family I love them. Bring me a blanket. I'll continue the session tomorrow. --- 🏆 BONUS: THE MS SUN SALUTATION Also known as: Why Did I Come Upstairs? Stand up. Walk upstairs. Stop. Forget why you're there. Look around. Walk downstairs. Remember. Go back upstairs. Forget again. Get annoyed. Sit down. Congratulations. You've combined cardio, balance, cognitive training and fatigue management while achieving absolutely fuck all. --- 🧘‍♂️ THE ACTUAL SERIOUS BIT Yoga doesn't need to look graceful to be useful. Use a wall. Use a chair. Modify poses. Bend your knees. Take breaks. Don't force painful stretches and don't turn balance practice into concussion practice. Some days you're Warrior II. Some days you're the Pissed Flamingo. Some days you're the Capsized Tortoise. And some days the best yoga pose for MS is simply: Corpse Pose followed immediately by Sofa Pose. Both of which I'm fucking exceptional at. 😂