I died in my sleep and arrived at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter said, "St1gzy, you've got two choices. Stay here, or go back to Earth as a chicken." Next thing I know, I'm standing in a field covered in feathers. A rooster strolls over and says, "How's your first day?" "Bit weird," I reply. "I've got this strange feeling like I'm about to explode." "That's an egg," says the rooster. "Just relax." So I do... and out pops an egg. "Amazing!" I shout. Then another egg. Even better! I push for a third egg... SMACK! I wake up to my wife shouting: "St1gzy! Wake up, you filthy bastard!" "What?!" "You're asleep on the sofa again and you've shit yourself!"