Scared of the future
Things seem to be getting worse, maybe? Yesterday I had to use a power scooter when I was shopping. I have a cane now. Two weeks ago I ended up in a wheelchair. I can’t keep up with my home. My husband is in the NVARNG (Army NG) and keeps getting activated for weeks at a time for these awful wildfires and he’s my caregiver. Not to mention in February, he deploys for a year. I’m scared. I’m 26 and life just keeps getting hard. I have a great career and am working on my second masters. I’m writing legislative proposals and advocating for disability inclusion… I can’t have children naturally but also I’m not even sure that I will be able to raise a child when that comes up. I was once a firefighter and now I need help to wash dishes. Anyway, that’s my pity party. I hope I didn’t bring anybody down just wanted to vent because I’m alone and feeling the feels a little too hard.
Venting is highly encouraged!! Let the emotions out. Stress is BRUTAL for MS’ers! You have described a scenario of ever increasing stress, with no buffers to pick up the slack, when MS says you are incapacitated. Can you get a nurse/aid to come in a few days a week, to keep you stabilized while your husband is doing his duties? Do you have a relative, or friend, or group of rotating friends, that could cook batch meals to freeze? Bring you groceries, bring in your post? You sound like an incredibly capable woman, and I think you have a lot of fighting spirit left! Just need to figure out a good support package, to relieve some of your burden.