Ugh. Never thought I would be feeling this lonely or even low like i am right now. My partner is annoyed of everything with me and that makes me me. I had a nightmare last night a horrible one where I was moving in my sleep and saying don't touch me. She was having anxiety as im sleeping yet I woke up from the nightmare freaked out like anyone else would. She's upset I move in my sleep, that i sit up in my sleep ( in pain and restless), I feel it that she hates repeating herself because I am deaf in one ear as I can't afford 1500 dollars for just one hearing aid, she don't like that I have memory problems as she things I use it as a crutch when that's so far from the truth, im not allowed to have emotions as I cry instead of getting angry, she don't like if I grunt or let out a painful moan due to my disease and I feel like she just doesn't like me anymore. Yet I am the only one who cleans and cooks, im up at the crack of dawn everyday for our kiddo and doggies, she sleeps all day then wakes up near dinner time and I feel im expected to stay up all night. She doesn't like that when I finally lay down in bed and fall asleep not long after ( yet as I said above my sleep is so crappy ). Its just so much and I feel alone. I miss my mommy horribly because I would atleast have her to understand and be compassionate. Yea my partner can be that which isn't often but she use to care deeply. She's going through health issues herself including mental things as I try to understand, try to be there and I do not say one word about any of it. Yet with me I get told about everything. Idk I just needed someone to bs to and vent because I am lost feeling horrible hating that im sick more than I already do in the first place and wishing I can have my lady back. Ugh I am even nervous to post this too.