Shift.ms is better if you're logged in

Writing this post while currently being infused, and since this place already contains masses of people similar to myself, I found that damn self of mine wondering how far the similarities run. I already found quite a few people that mimic the diagnosis side of my life, painfully down to the irritating symptoms, but other life complications have popped up on us all the same.  Having my personal MS nuke detonate back in November of 2021 coincided with another catastrophe I found myself mopping up—one due to my own immaturity and untouched trauma. Way back before MS decided to crash life’s party, the traumatic passing of my father to the tune of a suicide occurred when I was 17 years old–my senior year in high school.  It was always a family joke that I’d never graduate high school—with the one always making said joke bailing before even being able to be proved wrong but a few weeks later. His passing was and will forever be viewed as the blow that initiated both my desire to continue schooling for as long as humanly possible and, with time, begin heavily drinking due to my own negligence, fear, anger, and outright inability to grow the fuck up. And that was for over a decade, mind you, and a move across the country to boot! I sure stuffed that misery down into my big toe alright, and let me tell you, it came back with a vengeance.  That being freakin’ said: I could sit here and forever wax poetic about the diabolical shit storm that includes far too much explanation for just a feeler post; so, instead, who else dealt with addiction in the past or may well find themselves in the thick of it currently? I know I definitely did, and the purpose behind why I still do only comes from an area of help, support, love, and to provide proof that it’s possible to break free from the bullshit and—despite MS—maybe live a life worth more than sobbing into a substance.  Never be afraid to introduce yourself privately if the publicity freaks you out. For me, it’s hardly the bother as I fully intend on attempting to see out some sort of a writing career geared solely toward those addicted. Coming from someone that was also actively working in the field when smashed with the MS news—while at the very treatment center I went through—I’ve taken a pretty invested interest in the subject here. I find myself attracted to addiction both through the horrible choices made on my behalf that somehow made me wind up where I’m at, and also through the continued deterioration I now experience with a disease I never asked for, yet it dictates—fucking viciously—where I’m ending.  All of that tangential garbage to say: Do we have anyone else out there struggling with, have struggled with, or in the distant-and-proud past dealt with addiction? Remember that the ocean of temptation welcomes oh-so-many in its waters, and addiction never discriminates, including far more people than even they’d like to admit. Maybe this’ll be the chance to break down that barrier. Maybe it’ll be a chance to find others like us.  I’ll chuck myself under the bus first—hoping I’m not the only one, though I am accustomed to that.  I’m Kyle, by the way. I’ll be around a bit