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I’ve recently been diagnosed with RRMS. It’s been a rough couple of months that led to my diagnosis and it has taken every ounce in me and more to just hold it together and not let my life fall apart. According to my neuro I’ve had like three relapses in less than three months and have a lot of inflammation going on that hasn’t settled down. I’ve had to be both the sick person as well as my own advocate when talking to doctors and trying to get them to take all my symptoms into account and keep track of everything being done to me. All the same while I’ve been back at work albeit with reasonable accommodations like wfh and reduced hours and workload but still it’s been very stressful given that I had signed up to lead a major project before being sick and me being me, I still wanted to see it through when I came back - I don’t know why, maybe to prove to myself that I’ve still got it even though my brain fog makes me feel extremely dumb at times. All the same while I live alone, have no family here with everyone else being thousands of miles away. Currently, I am on a 5 day high steroid course followed by a six week taper which means that I’m going through all the fun side effects of that like feeling manic and “bipolar”(going through different moods in a matter of minutes), extreme hunger, at times just feeling nothing and of course the messed up sleep. This entire week I’ve been having only 4.5 hrs of sleep because my mind is racing in a million different directions every time I go to bed. I’m exhausted but I feel wired and alert but my eyes can’t even fully open. I’m fed up with this disease and my question to you guys is: does it ever get better? Even though the people around me have been supportive it’s been a bit annoying repeating the same conversation every time. I’m tired of explaining MS to everyone and I’m also a bit tired of having to explain why I’m okay one day and not the other. Why I’m limping this week and I’m okay the next. I’m grateful that they’re supportive and listening and being there for me but it’s just that I don’t want this to be my reality where I am constantly scanning my body for any new symptoms or the onset of my fatigue. Hope this doesn’t come across as being ungrateful- I am just venting. I know it could be worse and I’m grateful for that. If you made it this far, thanks for listening to my rant - I just needed to let this off my chest. TLDR: Does it ever get to a point that you don’t think of this as part of your every waking moment?