Last reply 2 months ago
LGBT with MS

Are there any others of the LGBT community who are members of ShiftMS interested in forming a separate support sub group away from the usual heteronormative? Me thinks MS affects our LGBT lifestyle in so many different ways so wold be good to share experiences

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watsoncraig
2 months ago

Shift is not “heteronormative”, it is a place to discuss MS and to try and make light. As your profile says you are and have been an activist.
Nothing I have seen here discriminates or labels anyone based on their sexual bias apart from your post labelling folk as “heteronormative “ (a word I never knew existed)
Everyone can like what they want, so asking to form a sub group is fine, just don’t discriminate against folk if they have different views to you, cause if I posted to start a White group I would be called out for being racist, which I would be.
If you want a specific group for your community, feel free just don’t make some of us fee worse!


watsoncraig
2 months ago

How to wind people up, level Master


ralee
2 months ago

@watsoncraig here was me thinking MS doesn’t discriminate or is it some people with MS can? MS is vile disease and it shouldn’t matter what anyones sexual orientation is or any protected characteristic. We are stronger together, and once diagnosed you join a wider family, who the vast majority will always help out where they can. If there are people who are ‘hetronormative’ then that’s a sad existence, people are people and everyone are just as important as the next.


stumbler
2 months ago

@pinkpot , MS doesn’t seem to discriminate on gender, race, colour, religion, sexual orientation or anything! Why would you want to?


amyshift
2 months ago

Shift.ms is a safe space and we want members feel they’re able to talk about anything that impacts how they live with MS. Whilst MS doesn’t discriminate, we can all recognise that people may be impacted in different ways and it is natural to want to find others who can relate to this experience. We encourage people to connect with others to increase their support network.

Please be respectful of other’s experiences and take the opportunity to learn from each other and share knowledge in a respectful way. We wish to remain an inclusive community and are distressed to see that the original poster of this thread felt their only option was to leave the community. We’re in the process of reviewing our House Rules to explicitly state our values around inclusion and diversity.


lilifee
2 months ago

@watsoncraig thats a really unempathic and downright defensive response. Perhaps you should simply listen to the people involved and not judge things you do not know? Furthermore, I believe your aggressive stance reveals more about yourself than about LGBT people.

@all : Diseases like MS are vile; we all know that. MS itself doesn’t discriminate; it targets everybody. However: The healthcare system sure is biased against LGBT people in many countries, which could result in less or no access to treatment. And for a vile disease such as MS, that definitely makes a difference.

I’m all for an LGBT group!!


itsmewithms
2 months ago

One of my favorite You Tube channels is “Life of Seb” as I love his outlook and enjoy his yoga;-) he happens to be gay and has posted specifically on being gay with MS and some issues that may affect us all but how they specifically affect him and what he has done. I encourage you to check it out https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCJEAgWFRLfJVtfSRzjmpN0A

Good luck-


Anonymous
2 months ago

@watsoncraig predictable response to be honest from a clear lack of empathy and understanding on your part. When i first joined this group i tired searching for LGBT people/groups as they will most likely understand certain situations / experiences with MS which, based on your ignorant response, clearly shows you wouldn’t. MS is vile for all people but also affects everyone differently including various minority groups.

@amyshift i was pleased to see you have responded in a positive manner here, albeit a member has now left the group who could ave benefited from support instead of some white privileged man causing clear upset to that person 🙁 sad times.


vixen
2 months ago

Hello all. I am playing devil’s advocate as I like making peace. I can’t speak for @awatsoncraig, but I imagine that what he was alluding to is that we are all unified by one thing – MS – and that therefore gender, race etc doesn’t come into it. Also, labelling people as heteronormative might imply that one can’t empathise with what it might feel like to be gender fluid/LGBT etc. Personally, I like on here when people don’t post a photo, and you haven’t a clue who you might be ‘chatting’ with, ie, there are no preconceptions other than whoever it is you are talking to, you have something in common with them regardless of their identity.

I don’t know @amyshift, maybe there could be an opportunity for distinct corners adjacent to the Shift conference room? That said though, all types of discussions are easily recalled through using the search button, and I imagine that might be more difficult to moderate? I think in this case, there has been genuine misunderstanding of what was meant, and it is a great pity to lose people for this reason 🙁


watsoncraig
2 months ago

I want going to be dragged in but
I have no prejudice against folk, what I do have prejudice against is the way some folk want “special” treatment be it based on race/religion or sexuality. We are all “special” in our own way


will_berard
2 months ago

… And that was an opinion that was a worthwhile contribution to this thread – in fact, as a first response, in your opinion, @watsoncraig ?


watsoncraig
2 months ago

I grew up in a time and place that being “woke” didnt exist. The humor of Alf Garnet and Mr Humphies I find funny. I am not racist nor sexist, I am just fed up being labelled so because my thoughts differ from someone else’s. I am not a sheep, I form my own thoughts.
We aren’t all here as we have a connection to MS (in my place it is that I have it). If my views are not suitable I will go find folk who don’t object. I am a white, straight, British man with MS. I don’t discriminate against anyone and will object if anyone discriminates against me, I have no need or desire to be part of any sub group based on anything!
MS does not discriminate why should we as folk who live it?


highlander
2 months ago

@watsoncraig
👏👏👏👏👏👏


will_berard
2 months ago

@watsoncraig. I am not arguing about your values. I am just asking if, in the spirit of nurturing tolerance, you think this particular opinion was worth voicing here.

You haven’t answered this question.


watsoncraig
2 months ago

It was as valid as the original post stating that this non discriminatory condition effects certain communities more than others.
Blunt but sometimes folk need that and not a touchy-feely approach.


miniaturedisasters
2 months ago

It didn’t say more than others it said differently. I suggest taking a step back and looking into why LGBT people feel they would benefit from having a space to discuss LGBT MS related issues. This might be a good start.
https://www.mssociety.org.uk/care-and-support/online-community/community-blog/understanding-what-it-means-to-be-lgbt-with-ms

I think the phrase “usual heteronormative” has antagonized you. To me this just means that the world views heterosexuality as default
or even preferred which of course poses issues for LGBT people, some of which are highlighted in the link above. I don’t know that you’d disagree with that.

Please take this with the kindness with which it is meant. I know from personal experience what it’s like to be reactionary to points of view that you maybe hadn’t considered before and sometimes it helps to take a step back and really consider where the other person is coming from.


laura-forde
2 months ago

I hope all people with MS find this forum of help from time to time. People naturally are drawn to others with similar life experiences but MS doesn’t discriminate in its symptoms.


laura-forde
2 months ago

Has the OP gone? Can’t see an account now


stumbler
2 months ago

@laura-forde , yes, the OP has left the building.


laura-forde
2 months ago

Ah OK, thanks for looking felt like a bit of a plum there


isa_elfers
2 months ago

Ugh. Really disheartening that I create an account and this is the first thread I see. I was about to go looking for an LGBT subforum because I do think it’s a specific intersection that warrants having a mini-community to talk about particular issues. It is not exclusive or discriminatory to wish to discuss problems with people who understand more than one part of your life experience. 🙁

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