Last reply 9 months ago

Hi Everyone. So got diagnosed with RRMS on 12th June, had first session with Ms nurse yesterday who said to come here for hopefully a more positive MS vibe, if that is possible! My wife is due to give birth to our first child in just under 3 weeks and I’m just concerned my MS will hold me back in the future from being a real active hands on dad. So just been trying to find positive MS news really, as most literature I receive makes you think that you’re definitely going to end up with mobility issues due to the images you see and when you read stories online it seems to be only the bad ones that come through! I don’t want to put my head in the sand, but want to try and focus on the here and now, which is sometimes easier said than done!

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9 months ago

Hi @dan_saunders and welcome.

First things first, stop randomly googling, for the reasons you’ve already mentioned. Stick to creditable websites like the MS Trust and MS Society.

Secondly, get and share your partner’s excitement regarding your impending new arrival. You need this distraction to allow you to take a breath and give yourself some time to interpret your diagnosis.

In the absence of your age, I will assume that you are relatively young. This will be in your favour. There are now medications to slowdown and potentially halt the progress of MS, which makes for a potentially favourable prognosis for you.

So, enjoy this happy experience with your partner. Live healthily, eat healthily and, if you can given the present circumstances, avoid allowing stressful situations to bother you.

And feel free to ask any questions that come to mind, we’re here to help and support.

9 months ago

Hi Dan and welcome. As Stumbler says take your time, enjoy what’s about to come and enjoy it. I’m one of the old codgers who has had the beast for 25 years, when I was dxd there was no DMT’s available, and even though you wouldn’t wish it on your worst enemy, now is a good time to be dxd because there is now a choice of dmt’s and if one doesn’t work they will try another. Remember, there us no such thing as a silly question with ms and we’re always here for a rant, a moan, a cry, a celebrate, anything you want, there’s nothing we haven’t said/done before, we don’t judge, we quite safe, and if we don’t know the answer Stumbler usally does? Look after yourself, let us know when the new arrival gets here, you’ll be a great dad!😍

9 months ago

Hello 🙂
I’m not a bloke but just wanted to share with you; I had a (what i now know) really bad relapse in December 16/ Jan 17. I could not walk and it was dreadful, scary, one of the most alone times in my life. All this horrid stuff because I didn’t know what the hell was happening and GPs had convinced me it was all in my head and i was loosing the plot.
After over a year of trips to the gp trying to get them to listen to me, I was referred to neurologist and diagnosed with ms (after all the tests). In this process i was put in touch with physio etc. Also got a pairof crutches which i did rely on for a while.
Anyway, after rambling on, I can now walk stick free WAHOOOOOO!! I do still need a stick if its longer than say, ten minutes, but even so I’m still mobile and getting about and keeping up with busy life.
Even if you did have a relapse which made you immobile for a short whle, i am absolutely positive that you would be back on your feet in no time because you know why and the drs know what needs to be done.
Sorry for the long message, i just wanted to try and reassure you that even if (although it may not even happen) the worst did happen, it’s not the end of the world. You can keep up with life in whatever way if you needed to modify it

Peace out, try and relax and don’t let the worry get to you and ruin your ‘now’ x

9 months ago

Hi Dan

There is no ‘definitely’ with this condition. I experienced my first MS episode being drop foot in 2007 one month before the birth of my first born.

11 years on I have two beautiful daughters who don’t have a clue what MS is, I am a real active hands on Dad.

Enjoy the becoming a Dad.


9 months ago

Hi Dan ,
I was diagnosed before we started our family and as my cousin with ms was advised by her gp NOT to have children , it was my biggest fear initially – 4 months later I was pregnant with our first and now 30 years later we have 3 children , 2 grandchildren and I believe my family has helped me greatly in my MS journey – I worked until I was 48 at a very demanding and energy zapping career and still am walking (albeit not always in a straight line!) so as someone else mentioned , live healthy and keep a positive attitude if possible and enjoy every minute of those precious lives !
God bless and all the best ♥️

9 months ago

Eat well, be active, rest when you can and enjoy each day!
For me sleep is key, with a new baby it’s not always easy but if it’s your turn on night feeds be as horizontal as you can with gentle lighting and savour the precious baby days, they fly by!

9 months ago

Hi @dan_saunders. Congratulations for your imminent arrival! On the MS scale of life, there has been an ‘explosion’ in research and treatment options in the last one or two decades; this will only continue to advance year on year. So now to important things; Dan the parent. As above, eat and think healthy, try to exercise without over-doing it. As Shift is world wide, if you have a sleepless night with little one, somebody somewhere will be around to respond to posts, so all good! Enjoy. 🙂

9 months ago

Look positively to the future and take each day as it comes. I am only recently diagnosed but I know it won’t do me any good mentally to focus on what the future holds. No one knows what is around the corner, even those without MS.

There are so many drugs and new research progressing every day. Try not to worry about the ifs and ands.

All the best for your new arrival, exciting times are ahead. Be kind to yourself x

9 months ago

Hi Dan and welcome!
I’m also relatively newly diagnosed with RRMS and currently experiencing a relapse, but it’s important (and easier!) to remember once you are given the diagnosis that they harder periods do pass and that the majority of the time, most of us can life a normal life, albeit with some adjustments.

Congratulations on becoming a dad 🙂 I hope this occupies your mind so you have little time to worry about the MS! I find that when I am being a mum, MS often comes as a second thought and parenting gives me a boost to do the things I may otherwise avoid.

Hope you find this site useful, I’ve found it really positive and supportive in times of general confusion!


9 months ago

Hi Dan

I was diagnosed almost 13 years ago. In that time I have had 2 boys who are now 8 and 12. I go to work and do everything that busy parents have to do. Yes some days, especially at the end of the week, I’m exhausted but my husband is supportive which is a great help. Good luck with your new baby and I’m sure things will be fine x

9 months ago

Such an exciting time looking forward to the birth of your first child -enjoy all those quiet times and make sure you both gaze upon that little bundle as often as you can.

I got diagnosed 21 ish years ago and my husband worked away offshore (still does). Three kids later (8,15 and 10) being a mum has been a marvellous and welcome distraction from focusing on ms and the things I can’t do as I have to push through and keep going as a parent. I am so very glad to have my two girls and one boy and a great husband and we have some great laughs – even managed to drag myself into a family day of kayaking off the Isle of Skye on holiday last week. Found it quite a challenge getting in and out but made it with my 10 year old son and instructor pulling me out! Honestly, personally I think our children really are a great blessing and I have found it pretty helpful and healthy to worry about others rather than always being stuck overthinking ms and every symptom that comes along. That’s not to say that any worries you may have are not completely valid of course, it’s just sometimes it is good to think of other things if at all possible! Wishing all the very best for you, your wife and your bundle of joy!

9 months ago

Ahh wow, first of all thank-you so much for all the messages. It’s great to know that many of you have children and for the most part seem to be doing pretty well. I am mid 30’s and have always been quote active, so plan on trying to keep up the gym and keep myself in the best possible way to be there and support as much as possible!

Am hopeful that trying to keep a positive outlook will help, and will stop Googling and getting myself wound up with what if’s – I need to learn to live in the moment! Going onto Copaxone soon, am a bit nervous about the thought of self injecting – but i’m certain it’s nothing like a lumbar puncture! 😉

Thanks again everyone much love Dan x

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