hoytfreak 02/05/15
Last reply 3 years ago
Don't know how to continue

I was diagnosed about a year ago and was on tecfidera for 6 months and now I’m on tysabri. I just left my job and am going to get fitted for a wheelchair next week. My wife kicked me out of our house and I miss my family. Her and our 3 sons. She doesn’t want to see a councillor and is packing up my things. I’m taking an antidepressant and I’m still struggling to get a grip on this. I don’t know if I can continue.

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3 years ago

@hoytfreak , if I said that time is a great healer, you’d probably think that I’m talking out of my butt!

But, this whole situation is still pretty fresh for you and the family. I mean the initial diagnosis, so everything that is going on could well be attributed to decisions brought on by the shock of your diagnosis.

The main priority at the present time is you and your health. Everything seems to have come to a head now, so you need to “let the dust settle”.

Both you and your wife need time to reflect on what has gone on. And you both need to consider your options for the future.

I wish I had a magic wand, but I don’t. So, use this reflection time to be kind to yourself to maintain your health. And see what happens.

3 years ago

Firstly, well said @stumbler 🙂

I have nothing to add other than *hugs*

Sonia x

3 years ago

Hi @ hoytfreak. Sorry mate that sounds harsh,, did it actually happen the way it sounds? You was diagnosed Ms and your wife said get out, what happened to in sickens & in health? Or have you gone nuts and she can’t cope? Anyway if it’s finished for sure you need to pull it together and plan how your going to cope. Don’t just give up. I know this is shit, I’m using wheelchair more and more, but still finding some good things each day. Gradually things will change. Hope your not thinking piss off you nob. Good luck mate. Sorry can’t actually help. No wand either.

3 years ago

Thank you @stumbler. I have read your reply over and over again and I think you are right.

3 years ago

Hi @hoytfreak so sorry to read your post about life putting you through the ringer at the moment.. and just want to pass on {{HUGS}}… hang on in there mate, you just never know what is around the corner. Best wishes

3 years ago

Went today and ordered a wheelchair. I’m still not working or in the family home.

3 years ago

Wise words from everyone. Things will be easier to cope with once your health is more settled. Changing meds on top of the daily strain of living with MS is quite something and I think you’re doing pretty well being as rational about it as you are. You may be powerless to change matters with your wife, but you can and should do EVERYTHING possible to be as well as you can be. If your GP or neuro team are not fully supporting you, make a fuss and get what you’re entitled to, whether that’s meds or physio or stress counselling. Don’t be afraid to tell the doctors if you’re not coping. Also, are you completely up to speed with the literature on the drugs you’re taking? It’s important that you are so that you get a sense of control about your treatment. Then there’s the usual (and difficult) need to keep fit, eat well, get enough rest etc etc. because if you’re not doing these things, you may be sure that the MS will identify your weak spots! No two people’s experiences of MS are alike but across the board stress has been shown to affect it very badly. Time to put your energy into taming the MS monster! Very best wishes, xx

3 years ago

Can I just say one positive thing about the need to use a wheelchair … after a while does it give you the best BUFF UPPER ARMS ever….!!???!! 😉 Whoo woo … Stay strong @hoytfreak .. seems positives can sometimes be found in the most unusual places 😀

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