I am really really sorry for this answer, but you will not:( I think that people, who have some disease have to struggle with it every second of the day...but this is not the point - the point is that you have things to fight for:)your family, friends, things you like, your love or just feeling that you can do the stuff alone! I do not want to scare you more than you are, but this fear is normal from beginning and later I hope you will find your own way how to deal with it...or you just need time...hold on!

or yes just scream FU.K YOU:dd it helps too...