Last reply 5 years ago
How long did it take you to..

I’ve had another relapse & whenever I do and it involves not being able to walk it just pushes me over the edge to feeling miserable and even stupid suicidal worthlessness thoughts (not that I’d ever have to bottle to do so).

I’m wondering if these feelings will ever go away, will I one day have a relapse and be able to deal with it and be positive. Cause I’m really struggling today. :'(

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5 years ago

Wow… heavy.

Everyone’s MS is so different.

At this moment thankfully I’ve not had a relapse so physically disabling… However… i can really empathise… As each relapse is such a knock.. I do wonder how i’ll keep rolling with the blows in the future.

I went through a CBT course via the neuro re-hab team at the hospital to help me develop coping strategies as things change… It was really useful… but hard to put into play for yourself when you’re feeling low.

I really feel for you and want you to know that there’s someone out there who is sending you positive thoughts.

Hang in there.

5 years ago

I’m only 23 and I’ve had such a troubled life even before the MS and I’ve always never let it get to me and kept strong but just feels like I can’t take much more. Feeling very much the sorry victim today even though I know I will recover this relapse, it just never matters when it’s not happening as fast as you want it to 🙁

5 years ago

@reens, a relapse for any of us makes us all feel low. It’s another unfortunate incident which upsets us, which is understandable. It’s an unwelcome event, which seems to be out of our control.
But, we know we’ll get over it and life will carry on.
Feeling helpless and sorry for yourself is a standard emotional response. We’ll feel pretty low, but then we get ourselves together and realise that tomorrow will be another day.
So, this has been identified as a relapse by your Neuro team? Has any treatment been proposed to help you?

5 years ago

I’ve been taking Avonex for 5 weeks, so not long enough for it to help, but getting on okay with it so far. Just awaiting for my nurse to rule out an infection but I’m pretty sure it is. I’ve gone from having no symptoms recently to not being able to walk, severe drop foot and multiple falls a day.

Think I need to speak to my GP about a review of citalopram, have been taking it for a while now and I guess I assumed it would help when getting to this state. Think I also need to find someone I can just off load any feelings and thoughts onto too

5 years ago

Hi @reens. I so feel for you. My own take on it when it has happened is that I’ve stopped beating myself up about things, because I know a) that I can cope with the MS when it’s quiet and b) I go to pieces if either the MS plays up or I get anything else wrong with me healthwise. I’ve come to realise that my body/mind can cope with the huge burden that is daily living with MS but CANNOT take on anything more. When I got my head round the fact this was how I would react to each setback it made it slightly less desperate, somehow. I’m not saying you can ‘plan’ for adverse health events, but if you can tell yourself ‘OK, I’m going to feel awful now, but when I get over it, I’ll be back to how I normally am’, it takes away some of the angst. Hope it’s like this for you, big hugs xx

5 years ago

Having a sudden onset of symptoms, does tend to suggest that you may have an infection, a UTI or some other little bug.
Our compromised immune systems get activated to fight this infection and our MS symptoms suffer as a result. I know this situation as a “pseudo exacerbation”.
If it is a run-of-the-mill infection, then once the infection is brought under control, the MS symptoms should reverse back to where they were.
If you fancy a brain dump of feelings and concerns, PM me and I’ll do what I can.

5 years ago

Hi Reens, so sorry to hear you’re feeling so low, I hope you’ve managed to speak to your nurse again and are feeling a bit more in control of the situation now. Relapses are never easy to deal with, not only do you have the physical symptoms to contend with, it does always feel like your MS is prodding you to say ‘I’m still here!’. That is always harder for me than the actual symptoms. Just wanted to say that you’re doing really well on your mission to find someone you can offload on- you’ve found a whole site full of us!! Take care and hope you feel better soon xx

5 years ago

Thanks @janep. Feeling bit better now, think I was just completely stressed at taking time off work when they are giving out redundancies soon (I know they can’t directly use my MS but I’m sure they are crafty to use another method). Took 2 days off to rest & heading back to work tomorrow, no infection so definitely sure it’s a relapse & will have to take it as it comes!

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