Last reply 2 years ago
Fed Up Rant …

Hi everyone,

I’m feeling really fed up at the moment. Admittedly, I’ve got quite a lot of sh*t going on at the moment, but I just wanted to run this past you and gauge your opinions, see if I’m just wallowing in self pity. Don’t worry, I’m not fishing for sympathy.

Okay, so diagnosed with RRMS in August with poor balance and weak left leg, lost my job in October (not related to the MS), started Avonex in November, forced to move apartment in December (I couldn’t afford to live there without an income), started dating in December, started job searching, interviews and being moaned at in the Job Centre in January. Still unemployed, still unpacking boxes in the new flat, still with poor balance and weak left leg.

So, my question is, how much of my low feeling can I blame on the MS, the Avonex or the disaster that I call my life? And has anyone got any advice on how to cheer myself up? Thanks, Daz.

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stumbler
5 years ago

@darrenl, it’s all the baggage that you’re carrying, which is causing your depression. That’s understandable as you have been through a lot over the last 6 months.
Are you in regular contact with your MS Nurse and do they know how you feel? They may be able to put you in touch with a Neuro-psychologist, who can try and help you re-focus.
Also, your GP may be able to help. A diagnosis of MS is a life-changing event, which needs to be taken on board and accepted. The journey from diagnosis to acceptance requires you to successfully navigate your way through various emotional stages. This journey can take up to a year and some assistance may be needed as you go.
So, chat it through with your GP and they can consider a short course of anti-depressants. Don’t look at them as a weakness in your character. You may just need a helping hand to get over this stage.
Hope this helps.


daveydingle
5 years ago

Been there mate . I’ve got weak right leg and my balance is very questionable on most days, thank heavens for walls and doors! I’ve still got a handle on working and my employer has been very understanding. A diagnosis in August as well for me . I’ve been down and now I’m on my way back up , with help from medication and counselling I’ve recieved.
To answer your question , MS can be crushing to recieve as it was for me , but I’ve moved away alot from MS being the begining and the end of the problem. I adapt and just get on with what get thrown at me!
Daz. If you want to rant on here everyday , rant away! Your not on you own . It doesn’t hurt to get it off your chest once in a while.


mostlysuperfluous
5 years ago

Hey Daz, thoughts go out to you man. your position sounds exactly like mine, balance, tiredness, left leg, lost job, dealing with job centre. The avonex didnt make me particularly depressed when that bout hit october/november because i was pulled off it for a move to tysabri. Ive managed to get my mood better by really managing my vitamins C+D and primrose oil and cod live oil to start the day and whenever i feel my symptoms get worse move FAST towards some water/food.
A bit of perspective with problems helps, stress is a killer and dealing with the job centre/NHS can be the wworst so taking one step at a time with these slow systems and putting yourself first is the best i think. Good luck man.


bamelia
5 years ago

@darrenl
I think getting it all out on here and off your chest is a good step! That is a lot of life changing events all in one year…
You mentioned dating in December, is that going well?
I hope I didn’t just poor salt in the wound x(
Try not to keep it all on your shoulders, stress can be such a damaging force when it comes to life in general
Good luck with the job search


cameron
5 years ago

Sounds daft, but some of it may be the ‘shifting sands’ of not yet having your accommodation fully sorted. Once everything is unpacked, it will become YOUR SPACE and a lot more comforting and homey. You’ll be able to relax fully with all your stuff and – hopefully – feel that much more settled. xx


darrenl
5 years ago

Thanks all for your advice so far. I haven’t told any of the healthcare team as I wasn’t sure if I should, or if it was just the ‘January blues’. I’m seeing my healthcare team in about 10 days so I’ll tell them all then.

Good advice about the vitamins as I’ve not bothered with mine in a couple of months, so I’ll start on them again.

And I don’t think the house thing is daft at all. It is still a sea of cardboard boxes but I’m off to Ikea tomorrow for some furniture. Thinking about it, Ikea could possibly add to my depression, but it’ll be worth it!

With regards to the dating, it’s going okay. If I’m honest I’ve been a bit tetchy, so I need to make up for that! Im cooking dinner on Saturday! We’ve both been single for a while, so it’s kinda odd when your single world rubs up against someone else’s – and no, that’s not a euphemism! You get a bit set in your ways if you’re not careful. I’m still feeling like a lovesick teenager, so that’s got to be a good sign. I’ll keep you posted.

And thanks for all the fantastic advice. You’ve no idea what a huge weight it is off of my shoulders being able to talk about it to people who understand and can offer real advice. Thanks a million!


reens
5 years ago

When I moved out from my first flat to where I am now (this is all before MS) it just didn’t feel like home for a good 8-10 months, I think unpacking and maybe getting a friend to help to relieve the strenuos unpacking & having company and a chat may help. Once you put your touches to where you spend a lot of time, I think that can become a comfort to you. Somewhere you feel safe?

Also, having a chat and just offloading all your worries to a stranger such as a wellbeing person or counselor can help too, sometimes its nice to just know you can say whatever you feel and its that persons job to listen to what you have to say. Hope you feel bit happier soon!


pottypete
5 years ago

I can only concur with what everyone else has said. Good for you for opening up about your problems. That’s half the battle, in realising you need a modicum of help. Hope you feel better soon.


cwpeace4
5 years ago

I agree with what everyone is saying, so I won’t repeat it. But there is some truth to feeling settled and taking over a place you live. Moving from Seattle it took me forever to personalize our place and just recently finally hung pictures, lit candles and made it feel like home.
The feeling unsettled part made me feel antsy, irritable and wanting to flea back to Seattle. But something happened when I surrendered to my townhome and gave myself permission to enjoy my new place. It was very cathartic.
Also venting here or to anyone you trust is very healing.


reddivine
5 years ago

Yeah get a friend to help wiv the unpacking and IKEA building.
Lugging flat packs and fiddly screws wd be beyond me….loss of strength & fine motor control. They DO deliver, so take advantage.
And if your unemployed, don’t be proud, try charity shops & Freecycle….you can get a load of stuff for not much. All helps.
Boyfriend of a mate did his whole flat from skips! Jammy bugger!
Soome ppl just have a good eye for stuff eh?


darrenl
2 years ago

Well, where did those 3 and a half years go? I stumbled across this post today and I wanted to say thank you – again – to everyone who offered advice. Things got better, and even though my MS has progress a bit over they years, I still feel more positive and able to deal with it – mostly. Still have a home, still working, still single – well, 2 out of 3 ain’t bad!

Thanks everyone! Daz

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