Draining a broken washing maschine with MS
Difficulty rating 1.5/5
Hero points 5/5
One hand that works how it’s supposed to
Towel to kneel on
Fork (for scraping loose change and shite out of filter)
Yorkshire tea ☕️
Sh1t eating grin
Stool to sit on and drink brew
Items should of had before starting:-
Peg for nose (smells like Greek sewer not nice)
More money to buy new washing machine who wants to fart about when can just buy new
Jumper as kitchen phookin freezing, brass monkeys in there.
Step 1:- boil kettle
Step 2:- make thee Sen a brew
Step 3:- sit on stool, sike self up with manly grunts as drink brew visualise fixing broken washing machine.
Step 4:- ahhhhhh! Satisfied ? smirk half hour later lay out towels, dive on floor and pull off access panel with screwdriver (mental note to self need the get in touch with manufacturers to make access panel More accessible to disablists this would have been a bastard to get off if the wife to be had not already done it for me while I was at work yesterday, bless her).
Step 5:- place baking tray to catch drips under plug type thing and slowly twist plug type thing till water starts to trickle aht into tray
Step 6:- as water now seems to have stopped pull out plug completely as to get covered in shitty stinking water (you deceiving bast*rd yer)
Step 7:- now your walnut sized bladder has decided you urgently need a wee, when your half way through a job you have put off for a week already hobble to toilet like a constipated penguin that has just been shot in the legs with a tranquilliser dart ?
Step 8:- now you have finished pissing about (quite literally) shove a fork in the but where plug came from and wiggle all the fluff, hair and bits of change that is blocking your washing machine up out.
Step 9: replace plug and inaccessible panel and pray to whatever god you need to (mines James Martin he makes reet good Yorkshire puddings don’t cha know) that it’s all working correctly again.
Step 10:- to be continued……..
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