janeb74 09/04/17
Last reply 1 year ago
Advice on telling Parents and kids

Hi Everyone! I was diagnosed 3 weeks ago and still struggling to believe the Dr. is correct. I am 42. I have only told 1 of my sisters as I needed her to drive me to my MRI appt. and for support to hear the news at the Neurologist. My long time boyfriend was away during this time. My parents and other sister live 16 driving hours away and I have 2 kids, 23 and 19 that live very close by. I feel like I am lying by not telling hem but wanted more info. before I did. I have 4 more appointments this month and another MRI in 5 months. I have made the decision to fly out next weekend with my 1 sister and boyfriend to tell my parents and other sister. I will tell my kids when I am back and then a small group of friends. After that, it is what it is. I dont want to keep it a secret nor let this define me. I am very very close to my family and especially to my kids, who I had a very active lifestyle with. I would love any help from your thoughts and experiences as to how to handle this process of telling my family, especially my 2 kids who will google everything. Thank you.

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stumbler
1 year ago

Hi @janeb74 and welcome.

Here is a short publication from the MS Trust regarding this subject :-

https://support.mstrust.org.uk/file/telling-people.pdf

The MS Trust has various publications covering all aspects of MS. You may find the “newly diagnosed” section useful as you come to terms with this diagnosis:-

https://support.mstrust.org.uk/shop


marcyg921
1 year ago

Being newly diagnosed is very difficult and I won’t tell you how to handle your diagnosis but ever since my first Doctor told me his suspicions I was very open about it because I’d rather they know and not assume I was making things up when I couldn’t do something and honestly, I don’t think I could’ve got through it without the support of my friends and family. At the end of the day, I’m still me, all that has changed is I need more help to do certain tasks and I get more emotional on some days.


janeb74
1 year ago

Thank you Marcy and Stumbler for your help. The link is a great source and yes I will remind myself that Im still me 🙂 just a different version at times. Once I settle into things I plan to be helpful to others like you are, as well as continue to learn more. Thank you!


janeb74
1 year ago

I told my Parents and Sister this weekend, and although everyone has their own comfort levels I have to say that I am glad I waited until I had some knowledge of MS so that I could answer their questions. Also, no longer making excuses is great for all of us. It was not easy as who wants to tell their family such news when there is no family history?? But I do have to say it is great that they are now in the loop and I was able to answer their concerns. Baby steps and knowledge with support is much better than stressing alone. Thank you for your support. 🙂


stumbler
1 year ago

That’s good news, @janeb74. And probably a huge weight off your mind. 🙂

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