@ophelia 

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ophelia

Feeling very alone...

Haven't posted for a little while but I feel I need to get things off my chest. I've started my Avonex now and due my third dose tomorrow. However I see my consultant on Thursday as I am being switched to tysabri due to having highly active RRMS. I'm suffering yet another relapse, my left side from under my arm is totally numb and have an awful stabbing pain under my armpit and in my shoulder blade. I saw my nurse last week and I just got the usual "I'll make a note of your symptoms". I'm in pain, and it's getting worse. I'm still off work (nearly 4 months now) with no end in sight. I go down to half pay in August and I'm scared...MS has thrown my already crazy life into a downright dizzying hell. I don't feel like I know how to cope. Do I ignore it? Embrace it? Kick it's sorry arse?!! I just want to scream and have a full blown tantrum. I hate what this has done to my body and my life. Please excuse the rant but I feel safe doing it here and that you'll understand.x
@lloyd

Oh yes Ophelia we do understand, I have the same numbness on my entire left side and drag my left leg like a zombie, but I can never give up and never give in. I doeskick our back sides but fight on sister your in the right place here. I am on social security disability so with my pension that I took early I am doing ok, do they have anything like that where you are?

@ophelia

I'm not eligible for any support as far as I'm aware. I can apply to a hardship fund through my professional union should I need it but I'm hoping they'll consider letting me back to work before that is an issue. I'm a midwife and I've worked ever since I left school. I need to work for my mental state which,as you can tell is pretty much in tatters right now. To say I work for the NHS they seem to have a pretty poor understanding of the condition!