14 Mar 2016 06:39Last reply 14 Mar 2016 16:17
He he he ???????
That's why the good Lord gifted men with strong hands!
8 fingers, 2 thumbs!
Win win! ? ?
You"ll have to help me lift it then Lisa......I"m not supposed to lift anything heavy!XXX
My wizard sleeves light as f**k.
No probs there! Lol.
Like 'wigwams on a windy morning'.
OOOOH,something to put over my ears when I visit Aberdeen then?XXX
In abz we get free 'ear flaps'
Only, what are the flaps made of?
It begins with 'L' xxx
The 'Labia Luggers'
That could be a team in super bowl!
Lol, haha xxx
Lisa"s beef curtains...a must have I reckon....XXX
Me and my welterweight wings!
Not a problem xxx
I used to get a lovely tune out of "em.and you can always have a toot on my piccolo..XXX
The Labia Luggers v's The Wizard Wings!
Wotta [email protected]@@n day! xxxx
V's Dekka Mcinnes!
That'd get my wings flapping!
Phwoaaaa! Il well roll Dick out the bed for Dekka!
? ? ? ? xxx
Decca the ex-Baggie,what a player for us he was..........How about rollin ol Dickus out for me again lassie?...XXX
Hes still a Scotsman dear DoD'ums!
Phwoaaaaa! No joke, I'm almost at climax stage thinking of his interview on Sat!
I don't give a shit if the sheep s##gers win the title (well I do a little)
Dekka is win win win [email protected]@@g win!
Ok, il give you a 101% that his knowledge came from brummy land
Why don't you join in my dear!
We've now won the league Dodums!
Let's have finger fun considering you cant do brain and [email protected]@k on the same blood flow!
Sorry Guv, sez I'd behave! It's georgys fault! He brings out the inner sex beast in me! xxx
...So Stumblerman is watching us from his hotel bed eh?............Put those 2 escorts down for 5 minutes Johnny Boy.........XXX
I can see John with the 'hot chicks' at the end of his bed!
Get on there son!
Bet he'd s**t himself if me and you appeared!
Hahahaha, can't stop laughing! Hes got them pole dancing on his drip stand! Xxxxxxxxxxx
...And them 6 boxes of Cialis on the NHS eh?..Didn"t invite me and you though did he Lisa?..........Prefers to play "hide the sausage" without us...XXX
John's being a 'cheeky bugger' leading dem lassies on!
Oh yeah 'can you bend down and pick up my headphones', lol, can't stop laughing bcoz I'm visualizing John with your cialis and dicks viagra!
Hes 'Raging', oh my, hahaha.
Moulogne Rouge! xxxx
Reminds me of the time when you and me were in bed;I rolled over and your arms and legs were cold and hard,and you let out the most awful squeal..............then I realised I was lying on Dick"s bagpipes!...XXX
Dodums where's your troosers??
I get a scare when I wake up next to Dick! Hahahahahah
Stop it, I dunno if I wanna pee, shit or climax! Hahahahaha
We are gonna get in bother from one of Mr guveners homies!!!
Blimey girl,if you can do all 3 at once,we got a date!!!! XXX
I'm still getting the option to delete!!!
Pmsl. But this is me! I can't delete my mind! xxxxx
Date it is Dodums.
May it be you have to lift my right leg for full penetration, then that's that!
You got the arm strength then I've got everything else
Stop it xxxxxxx
For F"s sake,don"t delete me....You aint accepted my friends request yet!.XXX
Full penetration,my arse......It"s like throwing a sausage up an entry with me,these days......Cialis or not....XXX
Like stirring the soup up the Dartford tunnel?
Hahahaha, aim, fire, f****g miss again!!
Worth a bash! xxxxxxxx
Just found your friend request with my 'ladle'
Oh good......Have I got my old sparring partner back or what?...I feel like a dog with 2 dicks again.XXX
Hahaha, does that mean you have 4 balls to rub?
F**k, best go smarten up my fine motor skills!
? ? ? ? xxxxx
Its the bit of skin in between that needs a rub my wench................and you have fine motor skills....XXX
Hahahahaha f***g haha.
Is that the 'good bit?'.
I was more thinking of the figure of 8 again in the direct hit bit!
What do I know..... Has he been faking all these years?
(On eBay looking up the shezing head massagers)..........
£2.99, and a free battery! ? ? ? xxxxx and I'm actually crying in laughter xxxxx
Oh yeah, wait till I position my chuggs!
I"d stick with the Rampant Rabbit if I were you mate.....XXX
....leave them chuggs as they are my wench........they hide your belly button....sweet...XXX
I don't have a belly button!
It's more like a family sized paddling pool.
Or an adults colouring in book!
No joke, the stretch marks would have you colouring in for your life!
You would rip every tendon in both hands and you wouldn't even get half way thru!!!
And you wouldn't be able to make a rolly for weeks! You ain't smoking mines!!! ? ? xxxxx
As long as I got your belly button full of salt...........I can dip my boiled egg in!....XXX
As long as it's just your egg you dip in. Let's live on the safe side??
Don't wanna be driving you to A&E with bell end nip!
Mind you, you'd have 3 hot nurses rumidging around!!
Let's live 'unsafe'.
Could make an nhs scuddy mag from it!
What do you guys call scuddy mags?
Pumping editions?? xxxxx
Just basic lads mags.....although I never bother borrowing Dicks,coz the pages are always stuck together...XXX
Basic? Bloody basic?
I still wouldn't pay £9.99 for no scuddy mag.
I've still got an imagination- paddling pool or not!
Dick just called raging mad (again), the 3rd junkie today walks out in front of a 44 tonne truck!
I dunno. It's rife with them just now!
Must be the blistering hot weather here atm! My ass. They are everywhere.
Question for you (serious)
Why do they walk like their top half in London and their bottom half still in Aberdeen? Like they have serious toldeys in their undercrackers?
I've asked all my health care professionals this but nobody knows!
There must be an answer somewhere?
Shite bags! xxxxx
Are we talking about junkies or lorry drivers walking with their arses out?..........It wouldn"t have looked so bad for Dick if he hadn"t been parked up at the time!....XXX
Dicks crack just full of skidmarks and vindaloo stains!
These guys are shitting themselves permanently, girls too, sorry, I'm gonna get an answer. It's like they are walking away from their knickers!
He caught the 3 of em on his on-board camera bcoz they are always looking for compensation of some sort!
Pond life!! xxxx
I dunno what the Worlds coming to these days.....you can"t even run anyone over now without getting into trouble.XXX
I always say 'just don't put your brakes on', use the domino effect!
I get hacked off going to chemist and I've to wait bcoz Billy, Bob, Bertie and Bernadette was there b4 me!
Oh yeah, I didn't chose my disability but they chose theirs! Why o why!
Ive been no Angel in my life but I've also been no smak ed!
Get me getting all serious! 3, 2, 1, snap out of it! Hahahaha. xxxx
Yes,my wench,calm down.......you"ll step on your weed bong,dancing about like that! XXX
Hee hee hee
As long as I don't stand on my crack pipe! I need that for bedtime!
? ? ? xxx
....and if you hadn"t forgotten,I still have an email address !!!!!!!! XXX
Oh yeah, the email address we do our 'deals' on?!
Don't tell the hoolies bcoz I've had a proper shit time with them like for 4wks now!
How long can you bum steer for?!
Joking, I'd never lie to the hoolies!
Never! They do a fab job ? xxx
They do mate. I was best man for one years ago....best stag night ever....girls,booze,Peruvian Marching Powder,the lot.XXX
Flake, white, snow, the works!
Good old hoolies! Great bunch!
You forgot the Titty dancers!
The hoolies lurv spending spondoolaz on hot chicks!
That might be my question of the day when they bust me next time!
Here Mr Hoolie, I danced in that bar 12yrs ago, do you remember me with the paracetamols on the ironing board that you wernt allowed to touch! £500 thank you very much!
Meant a fiver! Hahahahaha xxx
You"de never get away with it lassie...although you could always drop the "hey officer,you never did meet our 12 year old son did you?"one out...haha...XXX
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