We are a charity and rely on donations

Charity Number: 1117194 (England and Wales)

Registered Company: 06000961

Registered address:
Shift.ms, Platform, New Station Street, LS1 4JB, United Kingdom

London office:
Shift.ms, Somerset House, Strand, West Goods Entrance, London WC2R 1LA, United Kingdom

©2024 Shift.ms

@Aaron_Paul 

Last reply

Aaron_Paul

Limbo and fed up!

Hey I'm struggling with a positive outlook or general positive vibes. Just not having the best week with numbness, eye ache, fatigue etc and still no where near diagnoses and super low irrational mood swings I won't go into too much detail as you all know!!! So what's the best way to deal with a diagnoses? I just can't process it and with a diagnoses no where near the frustration of me knowing what's wrong with myself but not having the clinical evidence to start on meds to help is annoying beyond belief however I know you've all been there, some time longer than others but coping strategies with the uncertainty. How is it done?? (I have cbt tomorrow) not the same as first hand experience though. Urgh!
20
@jen1973g
@jen1973g
 

Ummm tbh i felt a fraud before diagnosis when I got it I felt weirdly happy/relieved that I could have tangible evidence I was ill but 2 years later I have realised that actually I’ve still not come to terms with it completely . I would say if you want to cope admit it’s out of your control because I’ve fought it in my head to be back to health. My biggest challenge is to allow my family and friends to love me with this lifestyle change I almost want them to abandon me so I can abandon myself. Then I came to an emotional pivot and that was when I asked for my mri scan details and researched for myself where my lesions were and how science suggests the damage areas effect me every thing was exactly what it said for me and I was then like it’s not my fault and instead of hating myself in relation to others I had empathy for myself that changed my frustrations because how can you be frustrated with something you can’t alter it’s futile. Be nicer to yourself or you will hate everything.

@Aaron_Paul
@Aaron_Paul
 

@jen1973 wise words. Thanks for the response. I struggle with the 'not in control' I suffer with health anxiety so i feared a condition i couldn't be in control of it's just sods law, however there is worse out there. Hopefully a therapist will help me change my thought process. I am just generally really angry at everything and everyone atm which is making me feel awful, when I'm positive I have such a good, productive relatively pain free day! Feeling sorry for myself it's pathetic. Can absolutely relate to the abandoning situation- I've momentarily cut everyone out so I can process things but not really getting anywhere. A bit of a self destruct mode moment. I suppose you just learn to cope and deal as time goes on a bit like grieving for a loved one i can imagine, I've read some horrifying stories (scarred for life) that I can' unsee but I need to remember everyone's journey is different, do your best and that's all you can do and I think that will bring me some peace! Also taking control and learning as much as you can about it is great. I think I can write a book on Ms the amount I've researched and the parts I wish I could unsee. But reading others stories on here isn't as bad as some other sites, it's a better vibe (and then I came along) Hope cbt helps (fingers crossed)