@oldmanjenks

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oldmanjenks

Goodness

Hello everyone, I know everyone has had to struggle so much throughout their course of MS and I want to congratulate everyone on how well they are doing:) So let's share some positivity! What is one good thing that you have taken away from your experience? I'll go first, I have learnt to only care about the things that count and stop caring about the stupid little things that get to you! What are yours?
Sutton, United Kingdom

NorasMom

@NorasMom

I'd have to agree with that. Aside from brief episodes of depression recently, mostly I'm quite happy and upbeat because the little things that used to get me down just don't matter any more. I think part of it's my age, too. You reach a certain point and suddenly you just don't give a damn what other people think. I find that I'm paying more attention to nature and what's going on around me -- The way the sun shines on the dew, the tiny wildflower growing in the middle of the yard, the beautiful sunset. Before, I was always so rushed, in a hurry to do this or that or get someplace else. Now, I just relax and enjoy what comes along.

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Bobbij

@Bobbij

I learned simple things are all that matter. Appreciate today 🙂

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oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@NorasMom that is a wonderful way of looking at it!

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oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@Bobbij exactly!:)

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jamoranto

@jamoranto

Yes I hear that @oldmanjenks. The struggle is real. Stay close to the company you call family. No better feeling to know that you are never alone. Best Jorge https://youtu.be/znbJfw4cvCI

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Vixen

@Vixen

Reflecting the above, I am much more able to see the value in things that are important and stay away from negativity. You always have to find a way to 'count your blessings' if you know what I mean. I don't mean 'there's always someone worse off'. In the UK, we have free medicine a law system which protects disability (eg in the workplace). And if you have friends and family well, that's just golden :-)

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GaryF

@GaryF

Such a good post! I've gained a lot from having M.S. I don't take myself too seriously, I hope, anymore. And I get to see the best of people. All the tiny kindnesses.

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oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@jamoranto no I agree, there is no better feeling! and that guy has a really good voice, nice song

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oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@Vixen YES! being in the UK is such a blessing, not a lot of people realise :)

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oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

Yes! @GaryF Love the attitude :D

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AndreaG

@AndreaG

Whatever life decides to throw at me, I can cope. Learning to let irritants go. Control what I can, ignore everything else. Take a light and polite approach to those who clearly know nothing about MS.

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Sesamebean

@Sesamebean

This is a great reminder on thinking positively. Sometimes its so hard when you are down..........but I have to remind myself it will pass (Eventually !!) and when it does, life feels almost more extraordinary because you are a superstar dealing with your MS ontop of all the other things life throws at you !!

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Dx24012021

@Dx24012021

@oldmanjenks , thank you for such a thoughtful thread! I am borrowing this from an article but it captures how I feel as someone who has been recently diagnosed; ' When I am at my darkest, I search for the dawn's first light. Something small. A little step. When I find it, I know that I am going to be ok'.

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oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

Yes, I totally agree with what you have said @AndreaG I have one question, what if a family member doesn't understand MS, what would you do?

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oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@Sesamebean YES I love that, what an awesome way of thinking about it, Love the name by the way aha

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oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@Dx24012021 just here trying to spread positivity and make people realize they are not alone and Wow now that is poetic!

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SJ123

@SJ123

Love the attitude . And the post. We need positive words.👍

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Chezy

@Chezy

For me, I had a double whammy of being diagnosed and my ex walking out. In 5 years, I've travelled, become quite the DIY enthusiast, started a degree and HLTA course and had so many trips with the munchkins. I've learned that I'm strong, not always but I handle alot of stuff. MS has taught me that I held back, didn't focus on myself and put so many things on hold. It's actually opened my eyes, life, I can deal 🥰.

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oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@SJ123 Always! it's the best way to deal with it :D

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oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@Chezy Damn! That is awesome! I fully agree with it opening your eyes too

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sprout

@sprout

I stopped being afraid of silly things like spiders and putting my head under water. I now swim and dive and it has greatly improved my balance and mood.

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Carolynbrooks

@Carolynbrooks

I would have to say I have learned so much about my body. Even though we have this "disease" our bodies are still incredible how they handle everything we have to go through. I also learned I am not selfish if I say I need to take some time for myself, or that I need something.

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oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@sprout YES, I love that Swimming is amazing when you have MS

oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@Carolynbrooks That is a great mindset to have! I also have to teach myself to be more "selfish"

watsoncraig

@watsoncraig

Expansion of my circle due to the fabulous folk I have met (in person and virtually)

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oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@watsoncraig That is actually awesome! I'm glad to hear it

Carolynbrooks

@Carolynbrooks

@oldmanjenks we ultimately have to be. We cannot let the stresses of others and situations out of our control influence us. With our bodies being in sensitive states simple things can cause a flare even on the best medication and lifestyle regimen. The old, "let it roll of your back" quip had definitely popped into my head more than once

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Anita

@Anita

I have learned that naps sometimes are a good thing! I can remember HATING to have to take naps as a kid. As an adult though I love them - don’t take one every day by any means but I’d say I average 2 times a week at least. Especially when I know 8 will be busy later in the day or the evening a nap gives me energy to face those demands successfully. Naps really are a good thing!

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Gem3

@Gem3

I’ve learnt.. to appreciate the smaller things more and live for the day ❤️

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Julia1605

@Julia1605

Appreciate life even more...and also I don't have fake friends in my life 🙂

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BULLMAN

@BULLMAN

Take one day at a time

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HappyHen

@HappyHen

That you will never be remembered for how clean the blinkin skirting board is or if you ironed the sheet! Some things have to go by the by....

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ant87

@ant87

I agree with everyone that has commented but I have learnt to accept help when I have been struggling however small it is and silly it is

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oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@Carolynbrooks so least amount of stress as possible? I like the sound of that!

oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@Anita I am on the same page as you, I used to hate napping but now they are a life saver aha

oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@Gem3 Couldn't have said it better myself!

oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@Julia1605 Yea I have found this to be very true, like a reset button was pressed

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oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@BULLMAN Very true :D

oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

Comment deleted.

oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@HappyHen Agreed! focus on what counts

oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@ant87 Yea! never feel ashamed:D

cascades

@cascades

What a great thread! I feel like I’m only at the beginning stage of all the learning but there is already a lot of stuff I’m starting to realize. @ant87 I feel like the help thing is going to be a big one for me. I’ve struggled in life before quite a bit but tried to hang in there by turning inward and thinking I have to deal with everything alone. Now even my body is shutting down and making me look at myself in the mirror about this and it hasn’t been easy to deal with… But it is an important lesson as many others struggle with this same thing. I hope it will make me a more compassionate and complete human in the end. And appreciate my body more as @Carolynbrooks pointed out. I liked the Thoreau quote "Our life is frittered away by detail. Simplify, simplify, simplify!” before but now it is getting new meanings. I’ve read some inspiring stories here about realizations. My go to is also humor. The darker the better often when regarding myself.

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oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@cascades Love that! dark humour is a big positive ahaha

shopaholic84

@shopaholic84

I have learnt to enjoy every single physical activity with my children and to push myself to do those things even when I'm tired. Keep the friends that have stood by me after diagnosis close and the others at arms length. This was highlighted recently after telling people. I am doing a skydive next month to raise money for a local MS charity 🙂. That MS is really only a small part of me and it will not consume me. (This is hard on somedays).

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JayJay10

@JayJay10

Hey Jenks, you have such inspirational thoughts and opinions. I will take such pride and positivity from what you have said. I will be keeping your words in my mind and use them everyday! Thank you so much for this post. Regards, Jamie.

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oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@shopaholic84 YES I love your outlook on it! and a skydive is on my list to do one-day aha, if you are raising money send over the link!

oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@JayJay10 I'm so glad to have done so! that has made my day:D

amsut

@amsut

Love this!!! I'd say for me, I'm so much healthier than I have been in years. Apart from the lesions all over my brain and spinal cord, obviously (haha). But I'm eating so much healthier, drinking much less alcohol, resting when I need to, and actually taking my antidepressants!! I'm putting my mind and body first. Would have to agree with you and others saying that the stupid little things don't get to me as much anymore. I have a much more positive outlook on life. Weird how that happens eh?

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supermum1983

@supermum1983

What a great post, I've started a mini veg patch, I'm more 'earthy' these days later lean towards nature I've come off Instagram. Even tho I'm in a painful relaspse I'm writing down 3 things I'm greatful for x

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HayleyJC1988

@HayleyJC1988

@oldmanjenks great post ! I have learnt to say no. I was a people pleaser and would take on other people's problems and help out. Run myself ragged but when I asked for something was never returned. MS has enabled me to say no, put myself first and without the guilt.

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oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@amsut Love the outlook and I wholeheartedly agree with what you say:D

oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@supermum1983. Good idea, Instagram isn't a good place! and sorry to hear! I hope you are okay

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oldmanjenks

@oldmanjenks

@HayleyJC1988 YES! So true, it's a one way street with that most of the time

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Boulevard_Soul

@Boulevard_Soul

I think that when you hit rock bottom and feel utterly hopeless, but then emerge from that experience and start feeling good again, it gives you a reference point for future hard times; a kind of proof that no matter how bad things seem in any given moment, it will pass and you will get through it, because you've done it before. MS taught me that all the clichés are true- nothing is permanent, everything changes, things move on, blah blah etc!

Richelle

@Richelle

I've learned to determine what things are worth my stress and what aren't. Knowing that actually made life a bit easier.